Who Am I?

I began my time in Melbourne as a fun-loving, adventurer type, working in the video and media industry as a Senior Creative Producer. My professional 9-5 career in the media industry lasted about 8 years, and reached a climax with me proficiently leading teams, developing products and planning projects. I left that world with a leap of faith, in trust that I would manifest my heart's desire of becoming a TV screenwriter. And while I spent many hours, months and years developing my own TV shows, life kept pulling me in the direction of deep healing and self-discovery following a mystical awakening & heaven on earth experience I had in late 2018. 

Right up until this awakening (including my entire 20’s) I was as a strong “Part 7” Personality; very social, very external, no inner world, loved partying, variety, experiences, moving from one thing to the next, busy trying to do as much as I can for fun, love and pleasure. My awakening was the peak experience that, little did I know, I had always been seeking. It filled me with so much joy, pleasure and fulfilment that whatever part of my psyche was projecting this “Part 7” personality became full, satiated, resolved and essentially took a back seat, whilst another deeper, hidden, repressed part of me came alive - my “Part 5” personality. 

The “Part 5” personality are deep intellectuals, deep thinkers, analytical, observant, love investigating into the details of things, to know and to understand. These are qualities that I simply never expressed in my 20’s - I could literally count the number of books I had read on one hand! Yet, after this event, this is exactly who I became; someone hungry for knowledge, who wanted to know what life is, what reality is, who I am, and now I would spend hours every day reading, watching youtube videos, meditating, journaling, doing shadow work, seeking for all the knowledge and wisdom I could to satiate this desire for knowledge and understanding. A similar seeking, but instead of cultivating a rich outer world, I was cultivating a rich inner world and instead of pleasure and connection, it was knowledge and self-discovery. Little did I know this turn, although unique and profound, was an archetypal coming home journey that is illustrated simply in Enneagram theory with the movement from “Part 7” to “Part 5” - see image.

Furthermore what this (and other experiences) showed to me was that our personality can change drastically many times during our lifetime when we are on a transformational path, and that each time this happens we are actually letting go of a false or "not self" identity, and assuming a greater identity of soul and higher self. And each time this happens our idea of self tends to expand beyond what we previously could even imagine. For example, if you told me 6 years ago I would be doing what I am doing now I would of told you you are a lunatic! It's true, these UNIMAGINABLE shifts are possible and happen when we break out of the limitations of false-self identity. 

Since the initial awakening I have undergone many very intense and dramatic awakenings (some ecstatic, some hellish) initiating me onto a deeply shamanic path. Along the way I learned my lineage goes back to the ancient and mystical Essenes of Levent and I was called to share my self-healing techniques and intuitive guidance abilities with others - mostly through 1:1 deep soul healing work, but also group facilitation of breathwork and other (mainly psychological) modalities. 

As a shaman and student of Carl Jung, my special area of interest is the conditioned mind and its shadows or unconscious trauma imprints. As much as I love and value The Gene Keys approach of focusing the majority of our attention on the gifts and siddhis, I found myself drawn to get super familiar, comfortable and accepting of my shadows and for that I found working with the Enneagram bore the most fruit, particularly in the beginning stages of my self-awareness  journey as I was getting to know my own psyche and personality.

I immediately had a deep resonance and strong understanding of the Enneagram as a tool for understanding the patterns of human behaviour and how they evolved, yet there were aspects of traditional psychological teachings of how to use the tool that did not resonate. So rather than mould my thinking to preexisting schools of thought for some reason I felt the call to go my own way with my understanding - must be the (5/1) Heretic in me. I believe I have a soul remembering of the true potential of the Enneagram and how to use it as a tool for deconditioning, healing and individuation.

I realised early on that accurately typing our personality with the Enneagram gives us a fantastic map of our conditioned mind, while Human Design offers us our authentic blueprint of our differentiated self. This is a clear journey or map from the conditioned mind to the deconditioned mind, which for me is an incredibly exciting and powerful revelation. Having become a geek with the Enneagram I wondered if I could one day integrate the Enneagram with mechanics of Human Design and the prophecy of Gene Keys to share this journey with its respective communities.

This seed was planted years ago, then in May 2022 I received the initial download for The Shadow Keys during a 10 day silent meditation retreat - for those in the know, my Pearl (jupiter) is Gene Key 24 - Invention, Silence. We weren't allowed any pens or paper during the retreat so I had to scribble some notes down on the back of a COVID-19 Antigen box - see image. 

Over the course of the next year I began to receive downloads and intuitions about how Enneagram connected to Human Design and how certain planets contributed to programming our childhood conditioning, and as far as I knew, these ideas hadn't been spoken about in Human Design or Gene Keys. A deep journey of discovery began to find how the planets correlate to how trauma / conditioning is imprinted from birth and leads to our conditioned behaviour and how this relates to Human design, Gene keys and the mystical Enneagram symbol.

During this time I had a very brutal and sudden kundalini awakening where pineal was activated and I left the 3D earth plane and was blasted into a hellish realm / dimension of my own mind for 3-6 months, at which point The Law of One & The Gene Keys books became my bible and my compass. I distinctly remember the words making so much more sense to me than they ever did before, particularly Gene Key 61 of Psychosis (which is The Shadow Key of my 24), but also many of the Siddhi's in my chart were activated. It felt like during that period I experienced all 64 Gene Keys; the full spectrum of human emotion and experience from heaven to hell, and if I'm exaggerating at all, it’d be only a little, as this experience was not of my Earthly human condition. 

Feeling so lost, alone and in pain during this period, but aware that others must have had similarly painful experiences, I had a deep desire to ensure that no-one was left stranded in this state without support ever again. I almost made it my mission to save people from the pain I was suffering, but in hindsight I know no one but oneself can save us from our pain. But, at least I could improve knowledge, awareness and support systems for awakenings. As far as I’m aware there is no commercial support for kundalini awakenings beyond India and some mystery schools, but for me that is not good enough, because the planet is awakening at increasingly rapid rates and lets be honest, a lot of awakening is fucking dark and terrifying - this should be plainly acknowledged and addressed, and I wish to be one of the few doing this.

I see The Shadow Keys as a potential third arm after Human Design and Gene Keys, where Human Design gave us our vehicle, Gene Keys mapped our North Star of where we're going and "The Shadow Keys" gives us possible pathways home and a "go bag" of gear, supplies and medical kit to get us out of the mud and the mire and into the gifts of our authentic being! Where the Gene Keys focuses on our gifts and siddhis, The Shadow keys focuses almost entirely on the shadow frequencies so we may befriend them and know them - must be the Shaman in me.